Sometimes I didn't know who I loved more my self or my poetry. The words that come to me are as satisfying as sex. Especially when you read it for the first time after it is completed. When you memorize it for a performance and nail it the feeling is indescribable. The problem with this for me was sometimes I forsaked everything and everyone around me for the love of lyrics.
Poetry brings beauty into your life if you appreciate it and share it for the right reasons. People came in and out of my life to share this beauty but in this I can say that I lost something. The connection with those closest to me was strangled and stifled because I loved the lyrics and the lifestyle of performing.
How can something you love cause you any pain? I guess this question is asked on numerous occasions by numerous people for numerous reasons. But I have learned that my choices dictates how effective my love is and how effective I am in showing it.
The problem was poetry was a vehicle to hide insecurities and uncertainties. A way to build up an artificial life while running away from the one I had to live daily.
The realization of this made me concious of my interaction and the distractions that can take me off course in becoming the man I want to be to my family, friends, and to myself.
